IMPORTANCE OF SELF – AWARENESS AND COMMUNICATION IN MARRIAGE

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For the couple who plan to be committed to each other in marriage must sincerely trust and respect one another and must have self –awareness of his personality and attitudes. As a person is growing up your personality, behavior and attitudes are within you and can be manifested to others who know you. You can be told, reminded, or hinted about your behavior, personality and attitudes if it needs improvement or corrected. It is up to you how honest you are with yourself and ready to change for the better. This self- awareness is very important in your own commitment of life at work, dealing with peoples, in marriage, and having a family. If you don’t have self – awareness of yourself your life will be a life of loneliness and self destruction.

Self-awareness of oneself will lead you to your goal to be committed to another person. In any relationship communication skills are very important as this can break or make your marriage. No amount of counseling will fix your marriage if you don’t know how to check, admit and solve your own problems and don’t know how to listen.
As a couple you can communicate verbally, and do small acts of love. If your spouse has a problem hold his hands, look at him in his face and eyes with love and care. Observe his body language if he is nervous, afraid, or hiding something. Never judge right away or accuse. Show your spouse you care and want to listen. Be compassionate. Your spouse is hurting. Hug him. Feel your husband if he wants an advice right away or not. One must be calm and understanding of what the other has to say and what you have to say. Before giving an advice think how you will deliver it so it won’t be misunderstood and never use words that would blame the other. In the mean time you can do some small acts of love by hugging him, cooking his favorite dish, dessert or refreshment, play cards, or any game. Simply cuddle each other in a couch and watch a movie till he is ready to ask for an advice or just to comfort him.

If the problem is sex, and it has been for some time, try to be honest to yourselves and find the reason what and where it started. Dissect the problem; if it is the caressing, he is too fast, you have not reached your orgasm and he has finished, or he is not gentle, you are dry and cold, or he is not romantic and cold. Remember that some spouses don’t want to talk about the situation. Remind each other that if you want the marriage to work out, both of you must solve the issue step by step. Pray for enlightenment for what to say. Prayers from the heart always work. Be patient. Let your spouse know what you desire and enjoy of the caressing, fondling, and also ask what he wants. Do the issues one at a time. The spouses also must be honest to admit of their mistakes and help resolve the issue if their goal is to love one another till death.

Misunderstandings and fights will cause division in married life. That is why it is important to communicate and do small acts of love to one another. Always remember that your spouse is your precious gift. Pray for one another to endure all the hardships, trials, and the happy moments of married life.

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